The Hot And Cold Of Misperception

It wasn't until the end of the day yesterday when I finally figured out the answer to a strange little mystery that had been nagging me.

I was curious as to why the faucets at the washroom I'd been using at U of Montreal were reversed, with cold (C) on the left  and hot (H) on the right. I knew it wasn't a Quebec thing, because the faucets in my hotel room, which were colour coded (blue for cold and red for hot) were as expected. Hot on the left and cold on the right.

Also, by habit, I used the tap on the left (hot), and never clued in that the water running from it (marked C) was warm.

When I quickly glanced at the faucet on the right, I had abruptly interpreted the scripted letter there as some sort of fancy and strange "H" - but in fact, only noticed yesterday that it was an F.

C and F?

Then it struck me.

French.

C didn't stand for cold, it stood for the French word for hot, which is chaud. And that fancy script wasn't an "H", but an F, which meant froid.

It's funny how our mind makes quick and often incorrect assumptions that, although we are presented with concrete evidence that supports an alternative hypothesis (the water temperature, the F, the fact I was using a washroom in a predominantly French society), we ignore the facts and stick with that first assumption.

Sure, this is a simple thing regarding faucets in Quebec; but how many more other assumptions do we make each day which can have an adverse affect on the things we do and the people we communicate with?

I'm reminded of the importance to pause, step back, and take another look (attempt to take a fresh look) at something I thought I was looking at. And let the information presented to me try to get through rather than be filtered by the auto-editing that takes place in my perception.

A good thing to remember. A chaud little life lesson perhaps?

You Don't Know Jack

Most of us didn't know Jack Layton personally. But that never stopped us from feeling like we did. That's just the way he was, continually presenting himself in a straightforward and honest manner. He was the kind of leader who easily blended in with the "everyman" mostly because, despite his role as a politician and the opposition leader of Canada, he was down to earth and humble.

Photo by Donald Weber/Getty Images News (2004)

Touted as the national party leader most Canadians would want to have a beer with (you can certainly put my name on that list), no matter which role he played, there was always the sense that he was genuine. Whether fighting for the less fortunate of the community, seeking out equal rights, conducting a local town hall or rallying the NDP party to a record-breaking victory, his convictions and integrity consistently shone through.

I remember first paying attention to him with the 2000 release of his book Homelessness: The Making And Unmaking of a Crisis. (I know, strange, isn't it, that a book nerd's first exposure to a long time political advocate didn't occur until said politician released a book) What I remembered most was the approach he took in this book and in the discussions he made when it was released. He gathered analysis, research and merged them with personal anecdotes, offering an understanding combined with proactive solutions. I remember admiring his approach and that's when his name stuck in my head. Except, of course, I was thinking he would continue to write books to inspire change for the better - little did I suspect he would continue to rise in the political arena.

But the approach in this book seemed to be his approach in many of the things he strongly believed and stood for. Well before his national role he continually took a firm stand for the rights of minority groups that the rest of society would rather have continued to shun. He was one of the few leaders who forged the path for attitudes to change in a progressive and positive fashion - and well before it was fashionable for a leader to do so.

When he moved from his role as Toronto city councilor and into the role of NDP party leader, he took his fight for the common person to whole new levels.

I have long admired Jack Layton's leadership and what he has stood for. Like so many Canadians I never had the privilege to know him personally, but that never stopped me from feeling like I did.

I remember bumping into him and his wife Olivia at Toronto's The Word On The Street a few years back.The two were walking hand in hand and enjoying the simple yet magical splash of book culture that WOTS brings to the city each year. And when I saw them and we exchanged a brief nod and smile, I had to remind myself that this wasn't that couple my wife and I have known for years and before this we had never met - despite the fact that that's exactly how it felt when I saw them.

Jack Layton left a legacy of that feeling in many hearts. He conducted himself with integrity, purpose and a wonderfully down to earth charm. He was the type of leader who could inspire and energize.

And in his last letter to Canadians, written just days before he passed away, he left Canadians with truly inspiring thoughts and words.

"Canada is a great country, one of the hopes of the world. We can be a better one - a country of greater equality, justice and opportunity . . . consider the alternatives; and consider that we can be a better, fairer, more equal country by working together. Don't let them tell you it can't be done.


My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we'll change the world."

Thank you, Mr. Layton. Thank you for showing us the importance of standing up for what you truly believe in. Thank you for your integrity, for putting the common person first, for rallying for community and family, and for reminding us of the importance of working together.

I only hope that we take heed and actually listen to this message.

With Great Influence Comes Great Responsibility

I haven't been blogging much lately because I'm been channelling much of my creative input full steam ahead into a book project (nearing the "finalize and sign the contract" time) which I'll likely announce relatively soon here on this blog.

But sometimes I come across a single line that makes me think and sends me back to bloggy land where I try to work out the thoughts that bounce around inside my head. (Seems I won't be able to get back to the project at hand until I spend a bit of time tossing and mixing the ideas formulating there)

In this morning's RSS stream, I was reading Chris Brogan's blog and had to chuckle at a line he wrote:

"Worrying about whether or not you’re an influencer by someone else’s measures is like having a toy steering wheel and thinking you’re driving the car." - Chris Brogan

Brogan, author of books such as Trust Agents: Using the Web to Build Influence, Improve Reputation and Earn Trust (co-written with Julien Smith) and Social Media 101: Tactics and Tips to Develop Your Business Online, has been an influence on the way that I think about and look at digital culture and social media for several years now -- particularly since I first heard him in discussion with a group of amazing techno culture nerds like Mitch Joel and Hugh McGuire on the Media Hacks podcast (which is built directly into Mitch Joel's Six Pixels of Separation podcast feed)

I've had the pleasure of meeting both Mitch and Hugh (even the priviledge of getting to share the stage with Hugh at the 2010 BookNet Canada Tech Forum for a talk called Trailblazing: Leading the Way to a New Kind of Supply Chain), but I haven't yet met Chris. There's no doubt, though, that I pay attention to the many great insights and valuable bits of information that he regularly shares and puts out there for free.

One of the thing I like about Brogan's blog post, and which appears consistently in his messaging, is the importance of using whatever influence a person has for good. Brogan demonstrates that repeatedly through his own social media interactions, regularly pointing out and sharing things he believes will add value to those who follow him, rather than visciously "selling" something of his own.

To me, Brogan is like the Spider-Man of social media, who does his thing to make the social media world a better place while constantly reminding himself that with great influence comes great responsibility. (With apologies to Stan Lee for adapting Peter Parker's penultimate catch-phrase into this new format)

There, all that meandering babble just so I could work out the fact that I think Chris Brogan is an inspirational super-hero type figure and that Stan Lee has likely been a subtle yet significant influencer on me for most of my life.

Okay, I can get back to my book project now that I've got that out on the table.

I Didn't Vote For You!

Watching the Conservative Harper majority government come into power last night was a little chilling, even for this writer of horror. 

I was fully prepared to have another minority Conservative government with the NDP as the official opposition. What I never suspected was just how decimated the Liberal party would be.

I'm still a little frightened.  Initially, to make myself feel better, I amusedly thought back to previous commentary I made about Mr. Harper being in office, back in Jan 2006 and October 2008): 

Jan 26, 2006 (Well I Didn't Vote For You! - inspired by a scene from Monty Python & The Holy Grail).  It opens with the following text.

Last night my son threw up in a sudden explosive burst.

This was at about the same time the news media was announcing the certainty that Stephen Harper was going to be Canada’s next Prime Minister.

And people say that babies don’t understand what’s going on in the world around them.

I know, snarky harsh words. But you must admit it's a bit funny. And that blog post goes on to explain the bizarre way in which we elect the leaders of our country. What better way than using a "Monty Python" inspired scene to do it?

But despire my initial concerns, here are few things that give me hope:

1) With such a startling new government makeup, there's a real chance for change, and a chance for the NDP to show us what they've got now that they have so many seats in office.

2) Within my own riding, the candidate I voted for got in, and she has consistently represented my concerns beautifully in Ottawa. (I pay attention not to the parties but to the candidates who represent ME in my riding, and I vote for the person who best fulfills that role - I'm delighted that both federally and provincially, the MP and MPP in my riding are solid upstanding leaders that I'm proud to have represent me)

3) While I still don't fully understand how 60% of Canadian's could vote outside of a particular party, yet that party still end up with a majority government, that % gives me a sense of hope that there is diversity and balance in the attitude of voting Canadians.

4) Elizabeth May, one of the party leaders I most admire, won in her riding, bringing the Green party into Ottawa - this is a refreshing opportunity for another fresh voice to be brought to the House of Commons. And wee desperately need that.

5) The leader's speeches were inspiring (unlike much of the pre-election debates) - Michael Ignatieff displayed perhaps his finest moment of leadership in his speech last night. Dignified, strong, respectful. Jack Layton kept on target talking about working for Canadian families, health care and jobs. And Stephen Harper's speech was inspiring (I fully expected he would still be our Prime Minister) and he was eloquently respectful of the other leaders. I'm curious to see if he will indeed work with the opposition and other parties to make a better Canada.

6) More people voted than in the previous election. THAT is important to me. Still, less than 62% of eligible voters turned out to vote. Really? What the hell is wrong with the 38% of Canadians who are demonstrating sheer "laziness and stupidity" by not voting? Every vote counts. YOUR vote counts. Don't let other people speak for you. (I have to stop now because just thinking about this type of lethargy makes me sick to my stomach - have to focus on the fact that MORE people voted this time around and hope that continues to improve as Canadians wake up and smell the democracy we're fortunate to live in)

So I remain cautiously hopeful. I am a "glass is half full" kind of guy, after all.

FYI, CHML has an excellent post that includes audio clips of the three main party leader's speeches last night. No, I didn't vote for any of them (because none of them are in my ridings), but I respect the things they each said in their speeches.

Cereal Dregs

Dregs, the residue or last remains of an item, are often looked down upon or overlooked altogether. They're often considered worthless residue, something to be disposed of.

But how many times can you not just make the most of the dregs you're dealt, but instead, look forward to them and appreciate them as something unique and actually substantial?

Take Mini-Wheats, for example, which is a cereal from Kellogg's made of shredded wheat and covered in flavoured frosting. Once you finish all the little nuggets in the box and all you're left with are half an inch of dregs at the bottom, you think the cereal is done and ready to be tossed out.

That's one way of looking at it.

I actually prefer the dregs, the little broken bits of wheat mixed with the dregs of the frosting. Mixed with milk it makes for a wonderful breakfast cereal. I appreciate the texture, the taste, the experience.

Yes, it's a small thing, but it's an unexpected area I derive pleasure from.

I sometimes look forward to eating the dregs of Mini-Wheats more than eating the actual cereal itself.

Interesting, isn't it, how our approach to something considered negative can be flipped if you take a different perspective?  Or that one person's dregs might be another person's preference.

Just sayin.'

Carpe Glacies

There's a tendency for us to panic when things such as "snow days" get in the way of our scheduled daily tasks and duties. For example, with a potential "snow day" looming, we can panic and worry about all the appointments we had planned for, all the plans we had set.

A "snow day" can throw is into a tizzy worrying about it setting us a back a full day of productivity.

Alternatively, we can "Carpe Glacies!" -- I'm far from an expert in Latin, but if Carpe diem, which popularly translates to "seize the day" and suggests we make the most of each moment, I'll toss out my Canadian version of that for the winter months in which we might "Carpe glacies" or "make the best of a snow day."

Yes, we can fret and fuss and worry about all the things we won't be able to do during a snow day -- or, we can embrace it for what it is, take advantage of the chance to be snowed-in with family and friends -- enjoy an unexpected "mental health" break from the daily grind from the stress we inflict on ourselves and simply pause to enjoy the simpler things in life - like the fact that we live in a part of the world in which this beautiful white stuff falls from the sky during the winter months and allows us an opportunity to romp around and play in the moment just like we used to when we were kids.

In other words, we can chose to "carpe glacies."

The Latest In Mobile Reading

I had to laugh. I think it was last week when I was scanning through my daily dose of RSS feeds that I caught the term "the latest in mobile reading" -- of course I got all excited and was ready to dig into the details to learn all that I could about some new mobile reading device.

Then I paused and thought about it.  And yes, that's when I laughed at myself.

Here I was getting all excited about some hot new technology that would allow me to do something as exciting as carry a book around with me virtually anywhere.  I mean, I already have that technology resting on my hip in my iPhone -- I'm completely content to read books on the iPhone screen -- and yet, every time a new mobile reading device is announced I check it out, like some young child hungrily consuming the increase of toy advertisements on television during the approach of the Christmas season.

Photo: "Reading on the Beach" by cmcgough (flickr)

And yet, despite my fascination with the new technology, there's nothing all that new about being able to go mobile when reading.

Books have, for over 100 years, been mobile.  Of course, the invention of the mass market paperback in the 1930's revolutionized publishing and made books even more portable and mobile. (And yeah, I can't resist the already tired old joke about their "battery life" being incredibly beyond anything we've ever seen). 

After all, once of the most important things I pack on every single trip I take (or have taken for as long as I can remember) is a book (or two) to read.  The new mobility enabled in ebook reading devices, of course, means that without compromising packing space, I can now carry a lot more books.  Except I find that though I'm always packing a half dozen ebooks on me, I usually also bring at least one physical book.  Sometimes it's because it's not available in ebook format, for the convenience of it "always being on" or perhaps just because it's a life-long habit of mine.

So it's funny that we're using a term like "mobile reading" to refer not to a technology that has been around for multiple generations, but to something that is only recently emerging; and that when you see the term, you think only of the new technology.

Funny how times have changed and a new term can be born despite the fact that the activity of being able to "go mobile" and read has been with us a long long time. 

(Blog Flashback - speaking of mobile devices, check out my musings back in May 2006 about mobile audio from a few years back called "Kewl Dude Portable Listening Device." which I wrote shortly after purchasing my first mp3 player)

Sales Ranking On Amazon

You won't find me bragging about sales ranking of OHS

I find it interesting how focused an author can be about their sales ranking on Amazon. Entire 2.0 campaigns have been centered on everyone buying a particular book on a particular day in order to increase the sales ranking on Amazon.

It goes to show you that, despite the fact I manage an independently operated bricks and mortar bookstore and have mucho admiration for the sales data analysis offered to Canadians via BookNet Canada's Sales Data (or Nielson BookScan in the UK and the US) I'm still impressed with the instantaneous and openly visible nature of Amazon's ranking.

It's too bad, though, that the focus for ranking highlighted by authors is often with a single retailer, rather than on the market as a whole.  And, at that, with a single retailer who has yet to host an author event, book signing, or other real-world event designed to support and promote an author.

Given that BookNet Canada's SalesData includes sales information from a variety of retailers within the Canadian market - a healthy selection of independent, chain and other retailers, both bricks and mortar and online, you'd think that a high sales ranking within BNC Sales Data would be preferable.  Of course, the trick is that, unlike Amazon's sales ranking, there's no place to actually see the sales data (with the exception, perhaps, of the Globe & Mail Bestseller List), nor is that information "live" to subscribers. So it's difficult for an author to get any sort of immediate feedback that their "promo/marketing campaign" is working.  (It's just the nature of the beast - BNC collects their data from thousands of points of sale and spends a great effort importing and sorting the data collected. It's no easy task to get such an authoritative collection of data.)

What I'd love to see is a campaign by a Canadian author to get their titles ranked high no matter WHAT retailer they purchase their book from. It would likely involve their publisher willing to let the data numbers be known openly for a specific title within a certain time period, and participation from the good folks at BNC. But I imagine it could be possible.

Imagine authors focusing a campaign to go out and buy their book all in a specific time period (since BNC collects and "publishes" its data weekly) by sending them out to their own favourite local bookstore, rather than a single retailer?  Imagine a focus on buying it in as many places as possible, rather than channelling all sales through a single retailer?

I know the challenge of collecting and sharing the data for a campaign like that is pretty daunting.  But wouldn't that be a cool thing to see?

The One That Got Away

Sometimes the most obvious things escape a person. All the clues can be right there and all it takes is putting them together, without much effort or thought, and there they are.

Like this picture of my Dad.

I always assumed this was a shot of him either miming hugging the person taking the picture (most likely my Mom), or perhaps spreading his arm in welcome to their campsite (I'd also assumed this was taken up at Opeepeesway Lake, a fishing spot off Highway 144 in Northern Ontario near Timmins), as if to say "This is my campsite, but treat it like your home, everyone is welcome."

But yesterday I found out it wasn't that at all.

Yesterday, when my mom was looking at the picture (I was showing her the "Good Men Project" details I'd mentioned on my blog the other day) she smiled and immediately said: "Ah. The one that got away!"

The one that got away.

My Dad, in the picture, was miming "the one that got away" -- of course he was. Who knew my Dad better than my Mom? She was right on. Of course, she was also the person who took the picture, so she also brought with her the memory of what he'd been doing when the picture was taken. It was taken where I'd thought, but the "intent" of my Dad's pose was different than I'd thought until my Mom shed the proper light on it.

With my Dad being the most avid fisherman I'd ever known, it should have been the first thing I thought of. It was always about telling fishing tales, always about the one that got away. Even the basis of the novel Morning Son which I wrote in honour of my Dad, was all about a son trying to decipher his father's secret fishing mysteries. The whole novel is a quest surrounding a life of secret fishing holes. It was always about the fishing.

So how did I miss that?

Likely because I overlooked the obvious things right in front of me and, instead, implanted my own perspective on the picture, rather than looking at it the way it really was.

How many times in each day do we do that when in conversation with others, when looking at the world around us? How many times, instead of seeing it for the way it is, we see it in a specifically translated way, tinted by the things going on in our own minds?

I got the answer by listening to my Mom. By actually listening. Simple as that. So, how many times in our daily communications do those little things a person meant to express to us "get away" because we didn't do the simple thing like listen, or look, without applying our own interpretations?

I'm willing to bet that sometimes the "big ones" get away and we're lucky enough to realize it or pick up on them later, but more often than not, there are plenty of "little ones" that got away from us that we'll never ever realize.

Birthday Worthy Moosehead Gift

My 41st birthday is in just a couple of days. This past Friday I got the first birthday card of the year, as I usually do, from the good folks at Moosehead.

Canada's oldest independent brewery has long been my favourite default beer to buy. In fact, here's a picture of me from about ten years ago at a cabin on Manitoulin Island when I used to hang out there and write while my Dad and cousin Rodney went deer hunting. Check out the beer in my hand.


(Don't worry, it was well after noon and I had already written two chapters in the novel I was working on that week.)

This year, my birthday card was a wallet shaped card. On the front it read:

FINDING A SURPRISE IN YOUR WALLET CAN MAKE YOUR DAY.

When you open the card, the inside reads:

Expect good times, wherever you go, with your wallet worthy Moosehead bottle opener.

Happy Birthday from your friends at Moosehead Lager.

And inside the pocket on the right was, of course, a thin metal Moosehead bottle opener that would indeed fit nicely in my wallet.

I tried it out on a bottle of Moosehead Pale Ale that night for dinner and was quite pleased. This interesting and surprising gift certainly made my day.

This isn't just a handy bottle opener provided to me by a brewer. It's evidence of an intelligent and interestingly run marketing campaign.

I'm already a loyal Moosehead consumer. And I have been for a long time. That day my beer fridge already contained three different beers from Moosehead. Moosehead Pale Ale, Moose Light Lime and Cracked Canoe. Moosehead didn't need to send me this wonderful little gift. But they did. And it made my day.

And it also reminded me of a truth about marketing that's critical to remember. It isn't all about blasting your brand or logo in front of as many people as possible. It's about making real connections with people who truly appreciate the product or service you offer. It's about recognizing those who are fans of your product and taking the time to appreciate them. Because at the end of the day, the importance isn't the flashy ads or marketing gimmicks - it's where customers hold your product or services in their hearts. It's how your customers themselves become champions of what you offer.

Moosehead gets it.

And they brew a fine product, too.

Guess what brand of beer I'll be buying next time I'm at the beer store?

The True Pathology of Unearned Advances

I quite enjoyed the Publishing 3.0 talk Richard Nash gave at the BookNet Canada Tech Forum a couple of weeks ago. Each week the good folks at BNC are releasing a new video of the talks given that fine day.

This is great -- because, not only were the talks informative and inspiring, but there were times when I was either busy writing down something a person had said or was tweeting about it that I might have missed something else. Oh, who am I kidding -- I likely missed lots of somethings, which means it's good to be able to listen to the talks again, and again.

Like the one from Richard Nash of Cursor Books who began his talk by discussing "the true pathology of unearned advances" then went on to talk about books as social glue and books as being a cultural icon that take 15 hours to read and how two different people reading and then discussing the same book can bring people together in a more meaningful way than any other.

But why listen to my feeble attempt to draw out cool salient points?

Watch this video and draw your own.

The Best A Man Can Get

I'm thinking that, as their slogan goes, Gillette is the best a man can get.

Several weeks ago, towards the end of a challenging pay period where the bills and expenses overpowered the amount of available funds, I was in need of a razor, having stretched the re-use of my existing one to about three times it's expected life.

So, at my local Shopper's Drug Mart, while browsing through the razor blades, I decided to forgo my default purchase of the MACH 4 Gillette razor (or whatever number they're at now, since they just keep increasing it to make it more and more impressive -- soon, I'm sure I'll be using a MACH 4000). Instead, I bought one of the cheaper knock-off brands -- in this case, the much lower priced Life Brand razor (a Shopper's Drug Mart branding for better prices on various products)

The Life Brand, in most other cases has proven to be a suitable compromise for me. Better price, seemingly no difference in quality.

Except when it came to the razor.

How do I best state this? Okay, let me try.

Ouch!!!!

Ahhh!!!!

Damn!!!!

Oy!!!!

By the time I was finished, my face looked somewhat like Frankenstein's monster. Seriously, the tiny nicks and cuts of outrageous fortune were all over my face, some of them running deep and taking well over a week to heal.

Needless to say, I eagerly awaited the next pay coming in so I could buy a decent razor. A Gillette.

BTW, this ad isn't sponsored by Gillette, and they know nothing about me talking about this -- IE, this isn't a sponsored post. I told myself to write it. I've also used Wilkinson and Schick and others, and they all do well, too.

I guess the point I'm trying to make here (aside from an attempt at telling a humourous story about hurting myself by trying to be cheap), is that you often get exactly what you pay for, and that, being price conscious when shopping is, of course, a good thing to do, but there ARE cases where the "deal" is not a "deal" because it's a lesser quality product that costs you something else.

In my case, the cost was blood.

I'm not slamming Life Brand, because there are various Life Brand items I use that are perfectly fine. But when it comes to safety razors I'm going to stick with Gillette and the other top notch brands that cost more, but keep my face smooth and sleek and free of the thousand thin razor cuts that flesh is heir to.

I'm sure you might have your OWN examples of when you tried to make do with a lesser brand or service because of cost savings and ended up doing yourself a huge disservice.

They're Doing The Hot Dog Dance!

Whenever Alexander is watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on the Disney Channel, there are two things he tends to scream out when he's watching each episode.

The first is:

"Do you want to say the magic words?"

And the second is:

"They're doing the hot dog dance!!!"

At the opening of each episode, Mickey invites the viewer to come inside his clubhouse. To make the clubhouse appear, you need to say the magic words. ("Meeska Mooska Mickey Mouse!") Mickey invites you to say them with him.

And, at the close of each episode, when the riddles or problems are all solved, Mickey and his friends to the "Hot Dog!" dance.

It's the "Hot Dog!" dance that Alexander gets most excited about. Because to him, it's not just about him participating along with Mickey and the gang, it's about everyone in the house participating. Actually, not everyone. Mostly Mom.

You see, I could be sitting beside Alexander and watching the show with him, but that doesn't matter. I'm not the optimum "Hot Dog!" dancer. Francine is. When Alexander yells out that they're doing the Hot Dog Dance he usually adds "Mom!" onto the end, because Mom is his favourite person to do the "Hot Dog!" dance with.

We all have our different dances (I do the Goofy dance -- well, most of it at least, since I haven't figured out how to pop my hat up in the air about 3 feet like Goofy does) and Francine does the Minnie Mouse dance. Alexander, of course, does the Mickey dance.

But again, it doesn't matter if I'm already dancing along with him. When they song starts, Alexander yells out "They're doing the Hot Dog Dance!" at the top of his lungs in the hope that Francine joins in. And, if she's within earshot (and his call has quite the range), she joins in.

I'm not sad to be left out. It's simply a preference Alexander has for this particular activity. Francine is his "Hot Dog Dance!" buddy. I suppose I'm his "Wall-E Video Game" buddy, since he prefers playing that computer game with me.

It's interesting how, at even such a young age, there are preferences for certain people matched up to certain activities. We all have our "Hot Dog!" like preferences, now, don't we. This type of habit is something that remains our entire lives. Think about certain activities you do with different types of friends. Aren't most of them typically slotted into nicely defined "holes?" How much cross-over is there?

IE, when there's a particular activity do you usually do them with a certain set of people? IE, you might have your preferred "drinking" buddies, your "games" buddies, your "philosophical debate" buddies, your "lunch" buddies, your "talk shop" buddies and your "gossip" buddies.

What other kinds of "buddies" do you have that you associate with a particular task or activity? Personal social context, it seems, plays a large role in our lives.

If you opened up your mind to include others who aren't normally associated with a particular task or activity, what would that look like? Would the experience be given a new layer of complexity and become better because of a new perspective the new person brings to it? Would it evolve? Or would it devolve?

Maybe in some cases it would be better, but in others it might be worse. How do we decide?

Certainly something to think about.