Inside, Outside, Loving All Around

Earlier this morning I was hit with one of those Facebook pop-ups. A memory from last year.

When I saw the picture I was reminded of an awesome time last year in a picture of Liz and I on our way to the Romance Writers of America conference in Orlando last summer. It was a crazy and fun road trip adventure driving from Ontario to Florida.

This is a great pic of Liz and I, and one of my favorites. Look at those two smiling kids. Fresh air, sunshine, an awesome beer spot. The world belongs to them.

But it was also an interesting reminder that, when I took this picture I was suffering from a nasty bout of food poisoning. The painful side-effects of the food poisoning was hitting me in repeated waves that morning, and just wanted to curl up into a ball and leave the rest of the world behind. I should NOT have eaten those raw oysters the night before. I haven't been able to eat raw oysters since then. Such is the post-effect of food poisoning.

The last thing I wanted to do was be in a car for 10 or 12 more hours, to be heading to a conference where I had to be on stage, on panels, conduct business meetings and Facebook live videos with various folks.

I remember the usual side-effects, combined with sweating profusely (not just the heat, but the fever of my body trying to get rid of the poison inside) that began that morning and lasted for days. But I was committed to this road trip, we had plenty of fun things to do on our way, and, arriving in Orlando, I needed to go on to do my usual work at the annual RWA conference with nobody I hung out with or had business meetings with knowing the internal physical pain I was suffering. 

Fortunately, I was a-okay mentally and emotionally, so was able to apply a "mind over matter" element and make the best of it. But not everybody is so fortunate. And some pain and internal suffering is not something where "mind over matter" works.

Reflecting on this was a reminder to me that perhaps, while we share the "perfect picture life" sometimes on social media, with big grins and a "smiling" exterior, there might be internal turmoils (mental, emotional) that aren't shared so cavalierly.

Maybe the "moral" of me sharing this (and apologies to anyone who thinks that my food poisoning experience is a little TMI) is to pause a moment to consider those you care about and others around you.

Even if they are posting happy and positive things, it never hurts to let them know you are there for them or that they are important to you. They might be experiencing pain that is invisible to the rest of the world. They might be suffering from an unseen anxiety or turmoil that isn't being shared.

Heck, maybe even strangers or others you encounter in your day to day. You know that jackass that pissed you off because they said something or did something in a way you don't agree with? Perhaps they were struggling with something you aren't able to see and perhaps it came out wrong. It might perhaps, be worth a moment or two of pausing to reflect on that and not jumping all over them.

And, even if that person you care about, that friend, or that stranger that rubbed you the wrong way isn't suffering, isn't it a good thing to just take a moment to spread a little bit of kindness, or love, out into the world?

The cost, to you, is virtually nothing. But the worth, to them, could be priceless.

There's Nothing Virtual About Death

I found out a few days ago that a friend of mine died last month.

Here's where it gets interesting, but isn't all that unique any more - not in today's online and connected society.

I've known this friend for about 5 years, knew her under various names/nicknames as well as her real name. But we never met in person. We were blogger friends. We'd connected via a weekly blogging ritual called HNT (Half Nekkid Thursday) in which people would post photos of themselves, typically taken by themselves, and then visit the other folks who would post the same. The photos would run the spectrum from "nekkid" meaning simple self-exposure shots of a person in their daily lives, or perhaps a simple shot of the paper cut on their finger they got at work that day, a picture of themselves with a dear friend, all the way to racy and less interpretive shots of "nekkid." But, often, the "exposure" wasn't the removal of clothing, but a peek into a person's inner self, an exposure of them. That, in my mind, has been where phenomenal connections and friends have been made.

I made a lot of friends through HNT and blogging (I started blogging in March 2005), some of whom I've established personal connections with "off-blog" and some of whom I've even had the pleasure of eventually meeting in person.

I never met Melanie Elizabeth Phillpott VanWinkle (also known in the blogging community as Stealth Bombshell and Texas Spitfire - perhaps other nicknames) in person. But we connected via blogging, via photos, via comments and silly humorous exchanges, and connected with our real names, later, via Facebook.

So I never knew her in person, but I knew her just the same. She touched my life, she made me smile, made me laugh, made me cry, made me think. I am a richer person for having known Melanie, even in this limited virtual way. And I am mourning her loss, but at the same time, wanting to celebrate her life and the fact that I have gained simply by knowing her.

The joys of the virtual online world exist. You can connect and share and communicate with great people you'd otherwise not have the pleasure of meeting in person. And that experience can enrich your life - because that's what other people do; they enrich your life.

But here's the rub: when that person dies, particularly when there's no "physical world" interaction in which people close to them know you know one another, what is the result? What is the healing ritual?

Typically, death involves ritual, involves a chance for people to say goodbye, for some ritualized sense of closure (even if the pain of that loss never fades away). But in virtual death, what is the ritual, what is the manner by which we can share our appreciation for having known a person, our sense of loss, our grief?

There was a fascinating discussion of this on a recent episode of CBC Radio's Spark between host Nora Young and guest Adele McAlear. And discussions like this help when dealing with this virtual loss. But it's true that we need to figure out a way to handle this all to common situation. A good conversation to continue.

But back to Melanie.

I found out Melanie died through another online friend who has enriched my life but I've not met in person. Osbasso recently posted a tribute to Melanie on his blog - the blog, whose weekly ritual connected Melanie and I, and thousands of other people together.

How do I properly grieve, other than post one of my favourite pictures of her and say something about her?

Thank you, Melanie - thanks for connecting, and thanks for enriching my life. May you rest in peace. May your dear friends and family find peace and comfort in all of the memories you gave them. And thank you for touching my life - there was nothing virtual about the way you enriched my life.

Melanie Elizabeth Phillpott VanWinkle

March 20, 1978 - April 12, 2011

HNT - Author Drop-Ins

Last week's HNT post, I talked about side-effect of getting to work with so many fantastic people who work in the book industry.

One of the other great side-effects of being a bookseller are author drop-ins.

Terry Fallis, McMaster graduate, was on campus yesterday evening to meet with the McMaster Alumni book club, who are currently reading his latest novel The High Road.

Terry popped in to say hi, and I, of course, took the chance to get him to sign copies of his books we had in stock, then slap the lovely CBA "Autographed Copy" book stickers onto the front of the book.

Then, after a 30 minute debate, a heated chess match that ended in stalemate and a furious arm-wrestling match, which I just barely won (but only because I had a fellow staff member distract Terry by grabbing his satchel and running away with it) I was able to convince Terry to pose with me for a picture. 

Naw, I'm only pulling your leg. Terry agreed to pose with me immediately after the 30 minute debate, likely because I finally broke down and cried when he said he'd sooner pose for a photograph with a pound of rotting meat. But whenever I pick up one of Terry's books , I'm inspired by the satire and wit of his writing, and often conjure up my own pale attempts to write something approaching humour.


But ah yes, author drop-ins are yet another fringe benefit to being a bookseller. Gotta love it.

HNT - Three Amigos

Between Christmas and New Years I had a brief chance to hang out and have a few beers with two of my oldest buddies, Pete and Steve (Er, not that they're old, although we're all getting a little long in the tooth - but that I've been friends with them for most of my life)

In the middle of the shits and giggles, I tried to snap a picture of the three of us. I took a half dozen shots, most of which were either too blurry, had my finger in front of the lens or showed just me and neither one of them.

Here's the best one. (Sad, isn't it, that THIS is the best one of the lot)

And here's the best out-take - Steve laughing at my lack of photography skills, and a pretty decent shot of one of my fingers. There's no fooling around with just the corner of my thumb - if I'm going to ruin the shot, that misplaced digit is taking centre stage.

The thing I love best about getting together with Pete and Steve is the fact that we can be downright silly and laugh uncontrollably like a bunch of kids at the stupidest jokes and all the simple things like flatulence that send children into non-stop giggle fits.

It's good to be able to just let go like that, let the laughter take over, and carpe diem, just like we used to when we were kids.

HNT - Hanging With Tom Over The Years

Last Friday night my good friend Tom Potts was in town for an evening. He had a stag/golf tournament to attend in Niagara Falls relatively early Saturday morning, and since the drive from Mount Forest to Niagara Falls is a good bunch of hours, he called to see if he could stay at our place Friday night. It was the perfect excuse to get together.

Fran and I were delighted to have him visit, particularly since we had originally made plans to have Tom and his wife Penny stay at our place for Canada Day -- unfortunately, due to a very nasty sinus infection and bought of bronchitis, that visit never happened, so it was nice to be able to visit with Tom at least for a few hours last weekend.

After a fantastic meal that Francine prepared and we all enjoyed, Tom we spent most of the evening sitting on the back deck, chatting, having some beers, catching up and talking about our love of music, writing and the creative process.  The first picture in this week's HNT post is a picture of Tom and I taken that night a couple of hours after Francine turned in.

Me and Tom - 2010

Last summer, around the time of Canada Day, it was the Levack District High School reunion. That was the first time Francine got to meet Tom and that we both met his wife Penny. Funny, we'd stayed in touch via phone calls and I'd gone to see Tom play with his band at a bar in Mount Forest, but the four of us had never gotten together before that. I don't think I got any pictures of the four of us together last summer. Too bad. We had some fun times and a heck of a lot of laughs. I was pleased to learn first hand how Penny embraces life with a fond enthusiasm that is addictive.

Now if we flash waaaay back to 1992, it was another L.D.H.S. reunion. We were all just graduating from university, so the "catching up" aspect of the high school reunion was pretty basic. Here's a picture from back then. Ah, look at how young, and happy we all were -- look at that wonderful mullet I was sporting. (Sigh, it still feels like yesterday that I could grow a full and health batch of hair on the top of my head)

John Ellis, me, Tom Potts, Michelle Norry-Simmons - 1992

And finally, here's a picture from 1986, the year when Tom graduated from high school.  I first met Tom when he moved to Levack to attend LDHS, staying with my neighbours. I was about 12 years old at the time, and Tom and I hit it off almost immediately. We were good friends through high school, but when he graduated and moved away I remember it being a really tough thing. We got together a few times over the years immediately after he moved away, and always had a great time together, but ultimately, in the last 15 to 18 years we have mostly communicated by telephone, and have only gotten together a small handful of times.

Tom Potts dressed to kill for high school grad, and me, uncomfortable in a suit - 1986

Interesting that the song lyrics I quote below from Rush were coming out at about the time this earliest picture was taken, and though I liked the lyrics then, I couldn't fully appreciate the sentiment expressed until a few decades later when I was sitting back with a friend and just soaking in the moment.

"Summer's going fast, nights growing colder
Children growing up, old friends growing older
Freeze this moment a little bit longer
Make each impression a little bit stronger"
     - Rush, Time Stand Still

 Time stand still, indeed.

Tom is one of those gold friends I'll always cherish, no matter how much time passes, or no matter how often we get to hang out together.

HNT - Predictive Science Fiction

Last week I had the pleasure of hosting the book launch for Robert J. Sawyer's latest novel rst at Titles Bookstore McMaster University.

It had been about 11 years since I'd hosting a book event for Rob in a Hamilton area store. (The last time was at Chapters in Ancaster when his novel FlashForward first came out) Not only is FlashForward a great novel (and the inspiration behind the hit ABC television series of the same name), but in it, Rob predicted that bookstores of the near future would have Print on Demand (POD) machines right in their stores in order to instantly access from millions of works of literature.

In his novel, there is a scene where two characters go into a bookstore then sit down to have a coffee while waiting for their ordered POD book to print.

Which is one of the reasons why I wanted to get a picture of Rob and I standing in front of the Espresso Book Machine at Titles Bookstore.

The pictures were taken by my pal Pete Rainford (known to the blogging world as Rainy Pete -- interestingly, I killed Pete in an online fiction serial that I wrote back in 2006 as part of a fund raiser for a local literacy group in Hamilton)

Photo by Pete Rainford

Photo by Pete Rainford

Of course, I'm also eagerly reading Watch right now, curious to see if there are any scenes in which Rob will reveal what I'll be doing in another 11 years.

WATCH Some More

Robert J. Sawyer is having a party in Toronto tonight for WATCH. If you're in the area, get thee there -- you will have a great time.

If you can't get there, here are some more video clips from the launch at Titles Bookstore McMaster University that took place on March 31st. (The first 3 clips can be found here)

Here are Part Four, Part Five, Part Six and Part Seven of the launch for Watch. These clips are wonderful evidence that an audience can throw out virtually any topic and Rob can speak to it quite eloquently.

I've included below only the embeded video for Part Five, in which Rob talks a bit about the television series FlashForward based on his novel of the same name, including some of the reasoning behind the changes between the novel and the television adaptation (I figured another blog post with multiple embedded videos might be a little bit of overkill)

The Launch for Robert J. Sawyer's WATCH

On March 31, 2010, I had the distinct pleasure of hosting Robert J. Sawyer's launch for WATCH at Titles Bookstore McMaster University.

We not only pushed the launch live to the internet via our MACBookstore ustream feed, but we also recorded most of the event so we could continue to share the thrill it was for us to have Rob kick off his latest cross-Canada book tour in our store.

That being said, I'm delighted to be able to share the event via the following three videos, which include Rob talking a bit about the WWW trilogy then setting up a scene from WATCH that he reads from.


Here is PART ONE which runs about 7 minutes.



Here is PART TWO which runs just under 7 minutes.



Here is PART THREE which is the setup and reading of a scene from the novel WATCH and which runs just under 9 minutes.



Rob answered questions from the audience for another half an hour after this talk and reading. I'm working on getting those clips compiled to share in a similar fashion.

However, as cool as it is to watch this recorded event, if you get a chance to see Rob Sawyer in person, do take it. He is a captivating and engaging speaker sure to delight audiences wherever he roams.

Read an E-Book Week

March 7-13, 2010 is "Read an E-Book Week" -- here is a list of various places online where you can get an e-book. Most of the places listed are offering free e-books (if not exclusively, then in addition to the ones you can buy) and others are offering discounts on their e-books in celebration.

I'm currently reading four books, two of which are e-books. Actually one and a half are e-books, since I'm reading two hardcopy paper versions and one pure e-book. The third I'm toggling between reading the e-book version on my iPhone when I'm out and about, and the extremely heavy 1000 page hardcover on my bed-side nightstand. (The back-and-forth between the two mediums depending on where I am has been a wonderful experience, making me look forward to a time where publishers perhaps "bundle" a free e-book version into the hard-cover purchase of a book)

I wanted to take the time to point people to an e-book version of the last book I had the pleasure of working on. Campus Chills, (which I edited), was produced by the bookstores at University of Alberta, Waterloo and McMaster.

The book (which retails in print version for $19.99 and is still available at the bookstores mentioned above as well as a selection of other wonderful independent bookstores across Canada), is now available as an ebook on Kobobooks.com for $9.99.

One of the things I like about Kobobooks (besides their Canadian roots), is the open manner in which you can read your ebooks from them. Rather than be hardware based, they let you read the book online or via a variety of different free applications. You can download free applications to read on the most popular smartphones, such as the iPhone, Blackberry, Palm Pre or Android.

Go check it out -- you can sample a bit of Campus Chills for free. And I strongly encourage you to do so, because Douglas Smith's incredible story "Radio Nowhere" is available completely for free.

You can either read it online or on your smart-phone. Doug's story is a wonderfully touching and thrilling tale that takes place at the University of Waterloo and involves the campus radio station, time displacement, and a duck. It's a "Twilight-Zone" style story that brings together elements of science fiction and atmospheric horror wonderfully and is not to be missed.

But, of course, as the editor of Campus Chills I'm a bit biased. So don't just take my word for it. Consider the fact that "Radio Nowhere" has recently been nominated for a Prix Aurora Award (Canada's premier science fiction award) for 2010 in the English short-story category.

Doug's story opens with the following line:

"On the anniversary of the worst night of his life, Liam stood outside the darkened control room of the campus radio station. Over the speakers, the Tragically Hip's "Boots and Hearts" was just winding down. Behind the glass in the studio, Ziggy's small triangular face glowed like some night angel, lit from below by her laptop screen. She looked up, her eyes finding Liam's in the darkness. Smiling, she wrinkled her nose at him. His own smile slid away, falling into the dark place inside him, the place that was always darker on this night."
- from "Radio Nowhere" by Douglas Smith

Okay, how can that opening paragraph not inspire you to go read the rest of the story? Seriously, STOP READING THIS BLOG POST and go read Doug's story now. The rest of this post is just me blathering on -- but Doug's story, now that's something worth reading.

Here is a picture of Douglas Smith doing a reading at Waterloo during the October 22, 2009 cross-Canada launch of the anthology. (Doug appeared with Julie E. Czerneda and James Alan Garder -- all three are Waterloo Alumni) -- BTW, the picture is blurry because the person taking the picture was so ultimately spellbound by Doug's story that they had trouble focusing on the camera operation.


Here is one of Doug signing copies of Campus Chills at the Waterloo event.


And here's a picture of Doug from a book launch and reading he did at the McMaster bookstore last year for the launch of his first collection Impossibilia. (His latest collection is called Chimerascope)


If you're still reading this instead of checking out Doug's story, I might as well re-link to the free story at Kobobooks.com -- if you don't have time to read it right now, download the app to your smartphone and read Doug's great story at your convenience while waiting in line at the grocery store or somewhere else where you find yourself with a few minutes to read and nothing on you but your phone.

If you like Doug's story, then chances are you'll like the other 12 stories in Campus Chills. All of them are set on campuses across Canada and written by some of the finest writers I've had the pleasure of working with and reading. And yes, they all have a special kind of chill to them (the stories, not the writers -- the writers have a special something about them, but the stories they wrote for Campus Chills, well, that's where the chills lie)

Or, hey, if you're still sticking around and reading this, I might as well toss in some self-promotional activity and say that if you want some other free stuff to read via Kobo, then check out my short story "Distractions" and "Active Reader" -- both are also available entirely free.

So there, if you've never had an e-book reading experience, I just provided links to 3 complete short stories you can enjoy without having to spend a dime. Not a bad way to celebrate "read an e-book week."

One Of Those Rare Beautiful Exceptions

For most serious writers, there's a standard rule:

Don't go the "self-publishing" route if you intend on being taken seriously by traditional publishers.

For every rule, there are always exceptions.

The experience that Terry Fallis covers in this short and intriguing video is one such exception.



I was fortunate enough to be one of the bookstore managers who, very early on "discovered" Terry's brilliant writing before the rest of the world figured it out.

I'm proud to say that I've been a fan of his writing since I first cracked open the cover of his originally self-published version of The Best Laid Plans and was immediately hooked by his prose. His writing contains a unique blend of Robertson Davies and John Irving elements that I find absolutely compelling. Or, to compare him to a contemporary, his wonderful combination of humour and suspenseful storyline is reminiscent of Linwood Barclay's earlier novels.

I'm even more proud of Terry's Stephen Leacock Award win, his publishing deal with M&S and his second novel.

Which I simply cannot wait to read.

Of course, I'll have to wait to Sept 2010 to enjoy The High Road.

Radio Nowhere

Douglas Smith recently posted the full story "Radio Nowhere" online on his website. It's an incredible speculative tale.

Of course, I might be a bit biased since Doug wrote the tale for me when I was editing Campus Chills, an anthology of horror stories set on campuses across Canada.

Doug's story "Radio Nowhere" (yes, the title is borrowed from a Bruce Springsteen song) takes place at Doug's Alma Mater, University of Waterloo and is a very fine and moving tale.

Part science-fiction, part Twilight Zone, this story is a wonderful example of what good horror can be -- quiet, slightly disturbing and about true human foibles and frailties. The "horror" in the tale is more about the internal feelings of loss and despair, the tail-spin a person can find themselves in when unable to move on after the loss of a dear loved-one, and the depths a person might go to in order to reclaim that loved-one. (IE, the true horror in Stephen King's Pet Semetary wasn't the cat or child coming back after having been buried in the special "resurrecting" earth of an ancient Micmac burial ground, but in the decisions Louis Creed makes in the depths of his overwhelming loss and grief) The same thing is true in Doug's very fine and moving tale.

The story opens with the following text. Hopefully this teaser will make you want to read the full story.

"On the anniversary of the worst night of his life, Liam stood outside the darkened control room of the campus radio station. Over the speakers, the Tragically Hip's "Boots and Hearts" was just winding down. Behind the glass in the studio, Ziggy's small triangular face glowed like some night angel, lit from below by her laptop screen. She looked up, her eyes finding Liam's in the darkness. Smiling, she wrinkled her nose at him. His own smile slid away, falling into the dark place inside him, the place that was always darker on this night.

Ziggy turned back to the mike as the song ended. "I'm closing with a request from an old friend, to an old friend. This one's for Jackie, from Liam. A hurtin' song, cuz he's still hurtin'. Fifteen years ago tonight . . ." She looked at him through the glass.

Fifteen years. He closed his eyes. Fifteen years and it still hurt this much."

- Excerpt from "Radio Nowhere" copyright 2009 by Douglas Smith. Originally appeared in Campus Chills (October 2009)

Should you read the full story, (and how could you not after that incredible opening?) feel free to nominate Doug's tale for an Aurora Award for Best Short-Form Work. The ballot for nomination is online and anyone who is a Canadian citizen can nominate a work for the Auroras. (Also feel free to nominate Campus Chills in the category of Other Works)

And just a quick note about Campus Chills, since I can't resist a chance to talk about cool projects I was recently a part of) -- Campus Chills was an anthology put together by University of Waterloo, University of Alberta and McMaster bookstores. The three stores pooled funding together to produce an anthology on the Espresso Book Machines that each of these three stores own and they paid professional rates to 13 contributors for original stories of horror set on campuses across Canada. The book features fantastic fiction from some of Canada's top authors of speculative fiction. I had the very fine honour of selecting and editing the work of these fine writers.

The book was launched simultaneously on October 22, 2009 at McMaster, University of Waterloo, University of Alberta and Dalhousie University bookstores as well as at the Algonquin College Bookstore. (Within a week all 13 contributors appeared at 5 different bookstores in 3 different provinces)

Below are a couple of shots of Doug from the Waterloo launch, hosted by the University of Waterloo bookstore.

HNT - Sonny

HNT, being a weekly celebration of exposure, is supposed to include a picture of yourself. But I have found that sometimes it warrants a "special guest" -- and this week's celebration of exposure does reveal a bit about me (as will be explained), but is also an exposure of my grief.

Francine's cousin Santo Amalfi (whom many of us called Sonny) died suddenly last Friday November 20, 2009 of a massive heart attack. He woke in the early morning with chest pains and did the exact thing you're supposed to. He went straight to the hospital. So, when it happened, he was in the best possible place to be to have a heart attack. But despite their best efforts, they weren't able to save him.

It was absolutely shocking and devastating to think that Sonny, who just celebrated his 40th birthday in September, was suddenly and tragically no longer with us.

Sonny leaves behind two young children, a wonderful loving wife, three very close sisters and a group of family and friends as large as his gigantic heart.

Memories of getting together with family at various gatherings over the years always included tales of Francine, her brothers and their four cousins getting into various kinds of mischief when they were children. Sonny could be quiet at these gatherings, often just sitting back and listening to one of his sisters or cousins recounting humorous stories about him, so I didn't always directly see his playful and mischievous spirit; but I have been privy to countless tales and intimately knew his bright and infectious grin and his wonderfully contagious laugh.

As we all gathered together in our grief and discussed celebrating the good spirit of Sonny and his "no-bull" attitude about enjoying life to the fullest, we started gathering photos to include in a music slide-show for the funeral home visitation. I set about scanning them and putting them to music.

For the three song set, I included two standard and fitting songs. Sarah McLachlin's "I Will Remember You" And Louie Armstrong's "What A Wonderful World." For the third song, given Sonny's affinity for fishing, I chose Brad Paisley's "I'm Gonna Miss Her" which is a tale about an avid fisherman being given an ultimatum from his wife that it's either the fishing or her.

For that video, I used dozens of pictures of Sonny fishing and hanging out with his outdoorsman buddies. In one sequence of shots Sonny is walking with two buddies and in typical Sonny fashion, moons the camera in a subtle way. So there's a shot of the three walking away, Sonny's butt hanging out -- then the next of him with his pants back up and laughing his special mischievous laugh. It was a perfect Sonny moment, which I knew many people would recognize.

But at the last minute, I pulled it out of the video, fearing it might offend some people. (Me, I'm not so brave and bold as Sonny was) But in any case, I thought this HNT would be fitting to include Sonny's "moon" shot as well as the video.


You could always rely on Sonny for either a laugh or to be there when you needed him. One friend wonderfully described him as a family man, a fisherman and a true friend.

At the funeral home visitations on Tuesday, there were endless lineups out the door of the hundreds upon hundred of people who wanted to pay their respects. In fact, at the end of the afternoon showing, which had already gone overtime for an hour, there was still a lineup that had to unfortunately be asked to return at 6 PM for the evening visitation in order to give the exhausted family a bit of a break. Similarly, the chapel was packed beyond capacity at his funeral and burial service on Wednesday. What further evidence of the incredible reach and effect he had on so many lives?

As one of his friends said: "He may have been small, but he had the heart of a giant."

We miss you, Sonny. Godspeed and let's hope the fish are biting good in heaven.

Da Count - Teachers

When it came time to write the dedication for Campus Chills, I started thinking about the theme of the book. All of the stories took place on campuses across Canada. Sure, they are horror stories; wonderfully written chilling tales all centered around university and college campuses.

And what's one thing that all campuses have in common?

They are places of learning -- institutes with a primary goal of educating.

It made me think about the teachers I had throughout my life and how fortunate I have been to learn under them. Yes, I know, everyone can likely easily think about that one horrible teacher who made their life miserable for a short period of time (like Harry Potter's Professor Snape)

But I have to say that I have been extremely fortunate to be able to look back at how many wonderful, memorable and top notch teachers I have had over the years. As far back as grade school, through high school and through to my university years, I'm very lucky to have had so many great teachers. Too many to name, but these teachers all left impressions on me, allowed me to learn new things and helped shape my development and life -- and for that I'm forever grateful.

I suppose I'm lucky to be working at an academic institution right now and I still get to work alongside some really incredible faculty members at McMaster. It has been an endless stream of fortuitous learning for me virtually my whole life. And I have teachers, instructors and educators to thank for it.

And though I had many great teachers, one in particular stands in my mind as the type of teacher who transcended the learning process. Jim Turcott, who taught Math and Physics at Levack District High School was a passionate and dedicated instructor.

Though I hated and struggled with math, I loved going to Mr Turcott's classes (he was also known as Dr. T since he also DJ'd) -- Jim used his passion for math and physics creatively and made the learning process fun. Having been active in the student council and in "stage shows" at LDHS, I got a chance to work more closely with Dr. T. whom I eventually began to call Jim after I graduated from LDHS. I worked for him for many years in his DJ business and learned a great many things about the art of DJing (this was back in the day of cassette tapes -- long before mp3's existed -- so cuing up a show and responding to ad hoc requests created quite a bit of work -- intense and challenging, but fun work).

Jim and I often bickered about music -- he was passionate about that, too. Me being a teenage fan of Rush, I often tried talking him into playing their music at our school dances. He told me that while they were talented musicians, you just couldn't dance to their music. I wouldn't take no for an answer and kept pushing and pushing in my bullheaded way. Jim was right. With the exception of some of their ballads, for the most-part, this brilliant rock trio has created a wealth of music, most of which simply doesn't work well on the dance floor. I only realized that many years later, and, of course, never admitted that to him.


As I mentioned, Jim transcended teaching. He became not just the guy who taught me math, physics and certain DJing skills. He also became a mentor and a friend and taught me a lot about life.

I recently started reading Gary Vaynerchuk's book CRUSH IT which explores how he turned his life-long passion into an incredible success story. Gary's story is wonderful and his passion leaps off the page immediately.

But one interesting thing is, though Gary does a wonderful job nailing the concept that doing what you're MOST passionate about is the key to success, it's actually something that Jim taught me several decades ago just through the way he lived his life. It's one of those basic elements that makes every single day a TGIT (Thank God It's Today) rather than a TGIF (Thank God It's Friday) sort of day. Reading Gary's book reminds me about that passion that Jim demonstrated every day, whether it was in the classroom, behind the DJ station or just hanging out with his friends and colleagues.

In any case, here is the dedication for CAMPUS CHILLS:

To all of the teachers, instructors and educators
who inspire, coach and nurture young minds

Particularly to Jim Turcott
Teacher, mentor, friend 1951 - 2008

Thanks for continuing to inspire, me Jim. And thanks to so many of the teachers out there who are passionate about what they do and help continue to inspire us all . . .

Avatar

I hadn't thought about it much, but when I started getting into various social media platforms, I decided it would make sense for me to use a single avatar.

The avatar usage started right here on this blog. I started blogging back in 2005, and I honestly can't remember what picture I had originally used when I started or how often I changed it around. But one of my buddies from work, Taras Shuper, had small pictures of his bloggy friends on the right nav of his website, and within it included a small head shot derived from a photo I had on one of my websites.

I quite liked it -- taken from a photo of me leaning out over the railing of the Staten Island ferry with the Manhattan skyline behind me, it was simple and obviously me.

From that point forward, I updated my Blogger profile blog avatar to the cool image that Shoop had used and haven't changed it since. I also updated my MySpace avatar to include the same head shot. (Though I did create a changing gif for that one, flashing between my profile pic and my book One Hand Screaming)

Then, as I joined various different social media platforms and online groups, like Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, YouTube and Goodreads, I used the very same avatar. Given that my original reason for going to the various social media platforms was to expand my networking as a writer and engage in various self-promotional activities (sometimes blatant and shameless, and other times subtle and quiet), I thought it might be important to have a consistent look. So if somebody followed my blog and then wanted to "friend" me on a different social media platform, they could tell, without much fuss, that it was indeed the same person.

Given that most of my social network connections use my writing name "Mark Leslie" rather than my full name "Mark Leslie Lefebvre" -- the consistent avatar also helped shed a tiny bit of confusion as to my identity. Those who knew me in person or from work should immediately recognize the tightly cropped head shot -- and those who knew me from other social networking platforms should be able to easily recognize that it was the same person.

And while I admire the fact that people frequently change the profile pictures on Facebook, matching their mood or something that is of great significance to them, or in the case of authors, changing their profile pic to their most recent book, that hasn't been something for me.

I can honestly say that since I joined Facebook I haven't once changed my profile pic from that fun headshot my buddy Taras created. I've been a "one profile picture" sort of guy from the very beginning. In fact, to celebrate, I just created a Facebook group to see how many others, like me, have maintained the same profile pic on Facebook from the beginning. I mean, why not? It's a fun social experiment, right?

As a point of interest, here is the original picture that my avatar headshot was derived from.


It was taken by my wife, Francine on the weekend of our anniversary several years ago when we were in New York. Having missed the ferry to visit the Statue of Liberty, we took a trip on the Staten Island Ferry at the top of the afternoon rush hour.

We had a fantastic time -- so one of the side-effects of using the same profile picture/avatar on so many different sites and platforms is that whenever I see it, it reminds me of the great time Francine and I had as well as of my cool buddy, Taras, whom I stay in moderate touch with online via different social networking platforms, but haven't seen in person in perhaps a couple of years.

Off the top of my head, I can think of at least 3 different online platforms/community/networking groups where I broke from this trend/habit and did NOT use that same avatar. Do you think you can you find them? I'm pretty sure you can, as at least one of them is among the more popular social media sites in use.

HNT - Flash Backward

Tonight on ABC a new television program premieres which is based on my friend Robert J. Sawyer's novel FlashForward.

If the television show is half as good as the novel (and all the trailers, ads and teasers indicate it will not only be as good, but will take the basic underlying thought-provoking and fascinating concepts from Rob's wonderful novel and expand them into a compelling and entertaining television show) then I'm sure I'm going to enjoy it.

The basic theme from the novel is predestination vs free-will, and, as I recall (because it has been ten years since I read the novel), Rob did an incredible job of covering those themes while telling a great story. The premise for the novel is that everyone in the world gets a brief glimpse into their future for just a few minutes -- it is the way that people react to what are often unexpected surprises in store for their future that makes it so interesting.

I'm pretty sure that the television series (which has the "flashforward" everyone experiences going only about 6 months into the future), is going to do justice to the themes Sawyer explored in the novel.

But enough about the television series, let's flash backward to look at 1999, when Rob's novel first came out and a few interesting trivial facts about the novel (and the interesting way I like to tie-myself to it. I mean, we all like tying ourselves to greatness, don't we?)

• Rob won the 2000 Prix Aurora Award (Canada's top honour in SF & Fantasy) for "Best Long-Form Work in English" for FlashForward.
• Incidentally, Rob also won in the category of "Best Short-Form Work in English" with his story "Stream of Consciousness" beating me in that category. My story "Erratic Cycles" was nominated that year. I couldn't have lost to a nicer guy.
  
• Interestingly, Rob's story "Stream of Consciousness" was edited by Julie E. Czerneda, who was also in the running against Rob in the Long-Form Work category for her novel Beholder's Eye.
• Also up against Rob in the Long-Form Work category was Edo van Belkom for his short story collection Death Drives a Semi.
• Also up against Rob in the Short-Form category was Douglas Smith (he had two stories nominated that year - "State of Disorder" and "Symphony"
• I republished Doug's story "State of Disorder" in the anthology North of Infinity II. Rob's story "Forever" was also reprinted in that anthology.
  
• Julie, Doug and Edo (who are wonderful writers) are featured in an anthology I am editing and which is coming out in a few weeks called CAMPUS CHILLS -- all all original collection of short stories born from the dark shadows of campuses across Canada by some of Canada's finest writers of speculative fiction.
• Rob wrote a wonderfully brilliant introduction to CAMPUS CHILLS.
• In the novel FlashForward, Rob has two characters walk into their local bookstore and request an "on demand" book. Then they sit down to have a coffee at the adjacent coffee shop while the book is being printed and bound on the spot in the bookstore. (Hmm, does that sound anything like the Espresso Book Machine that I currently have in my bookstore? Did I only purchase the machine so I could see this scene in Rob's novel unfold right before me?)
• CAMPUS CHILLS (which Rob wrote the introduction for, and which Julie, Doug and Edo appear in) is being printed on the Espresso Book Machines located at McMaster, Waterloo and University of Alberta bookstores. Each location is holding a really cool book launch simultaneously on October 22, 2009 featuring 10 of the 13 contributors to the anthologies. Julie will be at Waterloo (she is an Alumna from there), as will Doug (he's an Alumnus), Edo will be at McMaster; and our friend Rob will be unable to attend because he is attempting to "hermit" himself away to finish work on the third novel in his WWW trilogy
• I own a first edition hardcover of FlashForward (pictured below)
• Interestingly, my hardcover copy of FlashForward is one of the few novels of Rob's that I don't have signed. I'll have to rectify that the next time I see him.
• I'm pretty sure that after I see the television show based on Rob's novel, I'll want to read FlashForward again.
• I'm pretty sure that after YOU see the television show, YOU'LL want to read Rob's novel too. And I encourage you to do so (That's why I already have a nice display of Rob's book in my store, complete with an 11 X 17 poster of the cover of the book -- because anyone who gets the fact this show is based on a Canadian author's novel is likely to be asking for it on Friday)
• But do be warned. Rob is an incredibly talented writer and storyteller. Once you read one of his novels, you're likely to want to read the other 18 or so that he has written. The GREAT news is that you won't be disappointed. I have loved every single novel Rob has written.
  

Da Count - J.P. Couvrette

Yet another wonderful person was taken away from the world at much too young of an age. I learned with great sadness yesterday that an old buddy from high school, J.P. Couvrette, passed away this week at the age of 41. He leaves behind his wife and young girls along with many other loving family, friends and students whose lives he enriched.

My heart aches for their loss.

Though it has been a couple of decades since I have spent any time with JP -- it just happens that when you grow up and move out of your home town you fall out of touch with so many people who were a central fixture in your lives -- I am tremendously sad.

A relatively recent picture of JP I liberated from his sister Laura's Facebook page

But I thought I'd spend a bit of time reflecting on JP and my memories of him and how he, in fact, inspired me in my writing without ever really knowing.

I met JP through the realms of Northern Ontario hockey and school. I didn't really get to know him until high school. JP was a year ahead of me in high school, but I was lucky enough to be in at least one actual class with him when I took Grade 13 English while I was in Grade 12. JP and I sat together, joked around a lot and made fun of everyone who only listened to top forty music but didn't expand their musical horizons. We shared a huge fondness for a lot of different classic rock and were particularly passionate about the older Genesis music and Rush. JP had an infectious sense of fun about him as well as way to make everyone laugh. He was easy-going, loved to tease and inspired hilarity wherever he went. I absolutely loved that about him.

One of the other things I remember JP being so avidly fond of was fishing. When I was in Grade 12 I was editor of the high school newspaper, The Gully Gazette (our high school, Levack District High School, was pretty much in a in a large "hole" so it was a fitting name for the long-running paper). After long talks with JP, I convinced him to write a regular column for the paper called "The Fishing Hole" -- he used the pseudonym "The Poisson" (Poisson being French for fish). He did a fantastic job conveying his passion and skill within the realms of fishing and offering his expert advice.

I probably spent the most time with JP when he, John Ellis and I worked at Fox Lake Lodge on weekends, during March break and various other times when we weren't in school over the course of our senior years in high school. We did various maintenance jobs for the lodge grounds, ran the maple sugar bush lines in the late winter/early spring, and had an absolute blast. JP came up with the saying: "Laurie is always saving our ass!" -- which is a phrase he used a lot. And it's true that Laurie Blake, the owner of the lodge WAS always saving our collective asses -- we were, after all, three teens prone to making a lot of mistakes, from stringing maple lines down the wrong side of the hill to almost flipping the truck while hauling a trailer-load full of wood down a sharp steep corner hill. Just when hell was about to break lose, usually due to some decision one of the three of us made, Laurie would show up and saved the day -- thus, "save our ass" as JP so wonderfully phrased it.

In the cabin we stayed in, John took the bedroom on his own, while JP and I shared the bunk beds in the other room. I was on the top bunk while he was below. We spent many nights, after having sat around gabbing, telling jokes and stories, talking well into the wee hours of the night.

I have such fond memories of the pleasure of getting to know JP in that way, but there are also a couple of other things about those long-into-the-early morning hour chats that have stayed with me.

JP used to talk in his sleep and have strange nightmares. There were times when I woke to him yelling strange things, once kicking madly at the top bunk and almost throwing me off the mattress -- when he woke he said he'd been dreaming that we were working at the lodge and throwing stuff into a large garbage compactor, that he'd fallen in and I was crushing him. Another time he woke convinced I was hanging over the side of the bunk and shining a flashlight into his eyes. He accused me of this in the pitch blackness of a moonless night. It took me almost ten minutes to convince him it must have just been a dream. I found it fascinating that no matter what his nightmare was, I was often pulled into them.

Usually after one of his nightmares, we both laid awake, too freaked out to get back to sleep and talked endlessly about dreams, nightmares and sleep-walking. From those conversations, I developed the plotline to a novel that I started writing back in the late 1980's and which I have been kicking around on the back burner for all these years, returning to it every few years to chip away and modify it. Originally called "Perchance to Dream" it was about 3 teens working at a lodge in Northern Ontario (pretty original, huh?) -- one of them, who is sensitive to a long-hidden dark entity that exists on the lodge grounds, starts dreaming about this entity -- soon, it begins invading the dreams of all three of them and feeding on their unique fears to gain access into their world. I since have changed the working title of the novel in progress to "Night Terrors" -- I have even alluded to it in a novel that I HAVE completed called "Morning Son" which is set in the same area but haven't yet sold to a publisher. The whole novel's plot and storyline and character sketches for "Night Terrors" are completed, but it's only about three quarters finished. I might never finish it, but it's been a fun project to return to and work on and I have JP to thank for inspiration for it.

One other inspiration he gave me relates to those late evening chats. We used to tell each other ghost stories around the fire. But one night, while we were laying there after one of his nightmares, JP pointed out the haunting call of a loon on the nearby lake and told me a ghost story about an old indian warrior called "Old Crooked Neck" - I can't remember the details, other than that "Old Crooked Neck" was hung in a tree in the woods and the call of the loon was a warning to those who killed him that he was coming back to get his revenge.

Needless to say, I didn't sleep a wink that night. While JP eventually settled back down and went to sleep, I laid there completely frozen in fear every time a loon called out in the blackness of the night. I was terrified that "Old Crooked Neck" was coming to get us.

That long, sleepless night has stuck with me all these years.

It stuck with me so much that I ended up using it twice in two different stories I have had published.

I first used it in my short story "Erratic Cycles" which I wrote in the late 1990's -- almost ten years after JP scared the shit out of me with his story. In "Erratic Cycles" a lawyer traveling on Highway 144 in Northern Ontario (ironically not all that far from where Fox Lake Lodge is located), gets stranded on the side of the highway. The isolation brings back a childhood memory of being lost in the woods at night and of the "Bush People" who announce their presence in a call not unlike the haunting call of a loon through the darkness.

"Erratic Cycles" was first published in Parsec magazine in 1999, went on to be nominated for an Aurora Award in 2000 for "Best Short Form English" -- I didn't win the award, but am delighted that I lost to the brilliantly talented Robert J. Sawyer who won in both that category as well as Best Long Form for his novel Flashforward (which, interestingly, is now being turned into a highly anticipated television show premiering this fall on ABC).

"Erratic Cycles" was reprinted in 2004 in my book One Hand Screaming, and you can read the full story online from a link on my One Hand Screaming website.

I used JP's "loon call in the night" concept one more time in an anthology published earlier this year. Northern Haunts, edited by Tim Deal contains 100 Terrifying New England Tales -- all the stories in the book contain short stories meant to be read around a campfire -- it includes my story "The Shadow Men" -- a riff on the "Bush People" from "Erratic Cycles" I wanted to tell a story featuring that haunting call of the loon again, something I STILL couldn't get out of my head thanks to JP, so I crafted it specifically after seeing the call for submissions for this wonderful book by Shroud Publishing.

I'm likely not done writing stories inspired by my time spent with JP, which is, I hope, evidence of the lasting impression he has made on me as a person and as a writer. And though it has been a long time since JP and I spent time together, I will always cherish how fortunate I am for having gotten to know him, for the countless laughs and dreams we shared and, of course, for how he has continued to inspire me in my creative pursuits.

Goodbye, my friend. You did make the world a better place for having been in it -- I know you certainly enriched my life as well as the lives of so many others. You will be missed, and continued to be held in high regard. Godspeed, JP, and good fishing -- may you have found peace, comfort and an eternally stocked fishing hole as your reward for all the greatness you brought to your friends and family over the years.

HNT - I Left This Post In San Francisco

I spent almost a whole week at a pair of back to back conferences in San Francisco. The Collegiate Retail Alliance and Ratex Users Group typically meet in one after the other sessions in a different North American city during the month of July. This time it was hosted by SFSU bookstore.


In the usual lyrical farting around that I do with my status on Facebook (this time injecting multiple musical references to San Francisco and California in my updates) , fellow blogger and scribe Marcel Nunis noted that I was in his vicinity. San Francisco being relatively close to his regular stomping grounds. After a couple of emails and phone calls, we arranged to meet up.


We started our evening with a quick walk up Powell street from the BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) station where we met. Marcel pointed out various interesting establishments along the way, taking special care to note anything of literary significance (though we'd never met in person before, he certainly knew how much of a book nerd I am) -- One of the interesting joys of befriending someone via the blogging community is that you DO really get a decent sense of what a person is like through their blog posts and writing.

Interestingly, one of the many things we talked about was whether or not a blogger is being themselves in their blog posts or projecting a particular persona. Marcel, of course, has met up with several different folks that I still only know through the blogiverse. While I did befriend RainyPete, a fellow Hamiltonian and real cool dude I met through blogging, Marcel was the first blogger from afar that I had the privilege to meet in person.

Having met Marcel and spent several hours and many many drinks talking about a variety of fun topics, I can say that the fascinating, creative person you see on his blog is pretty true to form. Marcel has an endless array of interesting stories, viewpoints and experiences to share -- if it hadn't been a Sunday night when we'd met, we would have likely sat there shooting the shit for several more hours (despite me being extremely tired and still trying to adjust to being 3 hours behind. Midnight San Francisco time is like 3 AM for me)

One of our first stops was at John's Grill on Ellis Street, an establishment that novelist Dashiell Hammett used to hang out at. We had a fantastic dinner there before moving around to a few different bars. We ended up closing the evening down sitting on the sidewalk tables of a jazz bar -- with the band jamming and enjoying their creative fun, Marcel and I talked and played a couple of different "crowd" watching games with the various different people moving down the street.


What a fascinating and delightful experience to finally get to meet someone that I originally met through the weekly HNT blog posting ritual (so thanks for that, Os). I have to note here that it was one of Marcel's inspiration and creative "noir" story HNT posts that first inspired me to do something a bit more than just post a picture on Thursdays -- he was the inspiration behind actually attempting to do something different and creative (which led to me trying out the various different continuing HNT storylines I have tried over the years -- and YES, Susie, I know, I know, we're still trapped in toyland and that story hasn't been resolved . . . I'll get back to working on it)

And, having spent an evening chatting with Marcel over drinks and sharing tales and talking about writing and movies and theatre (and dozens of other topics), I returned more fully charged and inspired.

So, thanks Marcel. I'm looking forward to seeing you again in person in either of our travel adventures.

(Incidentally, it looks like Marcel also posted an HNT this week and he talks about our fun evening. I love these cross-over posts.)

A Poem for Lynn

One of the sweetest, kindest and most courageous people I've ever known passed away on July 2nd.

My sister-in-law, Lynn Bigras, passed away at the young age of 42 after a long battle with cancer. Over the past ten years she and Don have done absolutely everything that could be done to win the battle, have taken every step you can imagine, and never gave up the fight despite the odds.

When I first met my brother Don about a decade ago, he and Lynn were already married and had been together for a long time. So in my mind, they had always been together. Of course, after getting to know them, one could easily see how perfect they were as a united team, how natural it was that they should be the couple they were.

Their love, which began in their teen years and continued to grow over the past three decades, has always been an inspiration. Their coming together and never giving up despite the insurmountable struggles that faced them will continue to inspire.

Services were held for Lynn yesterday in Sudbury.

In an attempt to eulogize Lynn and celebrate her life, I realized that words could never properly describe all that she meant to so many people, the overwhelming sense of loss we are left with and yet how blessed we all are to have had Lynn in our lives.

But I did my best in crafting a poem for Lynn, which I read at the funeral mass yesterday -- and if I even captured one tenth of all the things that Lynn meant to us, then I have succeeded.



Lynn's Bright Star

A new star shines bright in the northern sky tonight
It shines down from an ocean of darkness in the night sky
Casting the goodness of light, the warmth of Lynn's love
On the earth below

A star shines bright in the northern sky
It shines down upon a young girl
With the cutest little spatter of freckles across her nose,
A charming pair of pig-tails
Bright, beautiful eyes filled with a special mirth
And a smile that lights up the hearts of those
Fortunate enough to bask in its glory

A star shines bright in the northern sky
Casts its light across a snowy field that sparkles like diamonds
The field is divided by the path of two snow machines
Racing on yet another fun-filled adventure of discovery
Echoes of laughter ring through the valley
The laughter of a father, mother and two young girls
Enveloped in the special joy of togetherness and family

A star shines bright in the northern sky
Shines down upon two young souls walking home from school
They are friends, yes, but something deeper stirs in their hearts
Blossoms into the special joy and wonder of young love
As they reach out to hold hands, that simple gesture will
Signal the beginning of a truly unique lifetime of love
A love that will continue to grow richer & get stronger with each passing day and year
A love that will grow strength and multiply in the face of challenge
It is an endless love and dedication that all others will marvel at

A star shines bright in the northern sky
Shines down upon a teacher leaving her classroom after another tireless day
Of filling young minds with information
Of sparking moments of imagination
Of providing youthful inspiration
An often thankless job, but one which she embraces
One which gives her purpose and pleasure

A star shines bright in the northern sky
Its light shines down through a bedroom window
And onto a young mother and her baby boy who sit quietly together
He swaddled in blankets and cradled in her lap
Her voice singing him a soothing lullaby
As she rocks him gently to sleep
And as he falls asleep, his tiny hand clasps tightly to her little finger
A special mother/son bond that nothing will ever break

A star shines bright in the northern sky
Shines down upon a beautiful young woman who, in the midst of embracing life
Will be dealt an unfair deal
A hand that would cause others to give up
To throw in the cards and fold
But in spite of this deal, this cruel blow
She will hold the hands of those loved ones around her
Continue to embrace life, embrace love
Continue to laugh, wonder and marvel at the beauty
That each day can bring
Her courage, strength, sheer will and determination will inspire
And upon her face she will set that unforgettable smile
The smile that lights up rooms and hearts
And reminds you that you are special
Just for having known her love
Just for having been a part of her life

Tonight, a new star shines bright in the northern sky
It casts its light down upon a large group of people
With their heads bowed in sadness
Their lives are suddenly filled with an emptiness
That, before, they could barely even imagine the depths of

Tonight, a new star shines bright in the northern sky
It wasn't there the other night
It fills a previously empty pocket of space
Shines down upon the earth with an intensity
That lights up a corner of the sky
One by one, the forlorn group of people glance up to the star
They can't help but notice its bright light, its pure beauty
It shines down on them with a rich, full light
That reminds them of that special smile of a little girl, the daughter, the sister, the wife, the mother, that cherished friend
And in the light of that star their hearts are warmed
Filled with joy and memories of laughter and adventures and
Special moments of tenderness and sharing

Tonight, a new star shines bright in the northern sky
It shines down upon us all with a strength that reminds us
Of that special, courageous woman who embraced life
Embraced others with open arms and an open heart
Tonight, a new star shines bright in the northern sky
Its light fills our lives with hope and joy and warmth
And we bask in that special light, that special love
Because we know that this new star
Which shines so brightly down upon us
This new star, that fills the dark spot with light
Will always be there burning strong in our hearts
Will always be with us
Will always be casting Lynn's special light
And her special love upon our lives

- Mark Leslie Lefebvre

Lynn (nee Brunet) Bigras
March 2, 1967 - July 2, 2009