Thursday, May 26, 2011

HNT - Spud Wars: The Final Standoff

This blog post is a serialized story continued from HNT - Spud Wars: Alex Attacks

As Alexander was struggling under the mighty attack of Darth and his clones, and just as he was about to give up, a disembodied voice came to him.

"Alex," It was the voice of Mister Bunny.

"Mister Bunny," Alexander said. "Why are you coming to me in a vision as if you've died?"

"I have died," Mister Bunny said. "Even before this "slightly re-booted" version of the original tale, I died of old age waiting for this damn Darth Tater story to end."

"Re-booted story?" Alexander said. "What are you talking about?"

"Worry yourself not over this," Mister Bunny said, reverting to Yoda-speak. "A self-referential mention intended to inspire laughter in the reader was all that this mention is. Let's get back to the issue at hand. I'm here to give you advice, young friend. Use the forks!"

"I would if I could," Alexander said. "But I don't see any forks around here."

"Hmm," Mister Bunny said. "What about the farce? Can you use the farce?"

"Hasn't this farce gone on long enough?" Alexander responded. "C'mon! Give me something to use here, man!"

Mister Bunny's specter started to fade, and as it did he said this: "Just remember, you're stronger than you seem, braver that you believe and smarter than you think . . ."

"Oh sure, it's not bad enough that you're a bizarre spoof of Yoda and Obi-Wan, but now you're ripping off the advice that Christopher Robin tells Winnie The Pooh in "The Search for Christopher Robin"


Fed up, and thinking it's about time this story had more pictures than text, Alexander broke free from the hold Darth had on him, fell to the floor, and launched an all-out attack on the clones, smashing them with a series of punches, chops and kicks.

Wailing out a steady battle cry, he kept kicking and punching and chopping at them until they were nothing but a pile of Tater parts on the ground. And, with just his main nemesis of Darth Tater left, he lifted him into the air . . .
. . . and put him into a special Jedi-inspired arm-lock.

"Do you give, do you give?" Alexander said, with an iron-tight grip on his foe.


"Er, I gave at the office," Darth Tater said.

"No," Alexander said. "I mean, do you give up?"

"Yes, of course, I give, I give," Darth Tater said. "But, please put me down, I have something important to say . . ."


To be continued . . . next Thursday

What IS Darth about to say? Is he going to say he's is dying of boredome just like Mister Bunny? Are YOU ready to die of boredom yet? (Mister Bunny, died, BTW, in the middle of the original telling of this storyline back in 2006, and much like Obi-Wan and Yoda, his presence and sage advice is still felt in the Leslie household)

* The font used for the SPUD WARS logo above came from Boba Fonts on Fontspace - check out all their cool designs.

 

No comments: