Bachelor Daze

Welcome to another installment of, "Come ON -- tell me the WHOLE story!" otherwise known as "I love to talk about myself", and in a pinch can be called Me-Me Monday.

The object of the game is to refer to your 101 Things About Me list, pick one of your "things" and tell the whole sordid tale. I don't yet have a full 101 Thing About Me list, but do plan on growing one. So when I play Me-Me Monday" I'll add to my list.

25. I had always been a bit of a loner and comfortable with spending endless hours of time alone -- until recently. Now, however, when Francine or Alexander aren’t around, it’s just not any fun.

This past Saturday morning, Fran and Alexander and I drove up to Sudbury (actually, Levack, about 45 minutes north of Sudbury) to my mom’s home. I came back yesterday on the bus. Francine and Alexander are going to spend the week there. We thought it’d be good for him to spend some time with his Grandmother and Great Grandmother and also to actually see snow for more than 2 hours in a row (which is about how long the stuff lasts around here lately)

When I first thought about living a whole week as a bachelor again, with virtually no responsibility other than looking after myself, I had these George Costanza visions of walking around in nothing but my underwear, of sitting on the couch in front of the television and eating a block of cheese the size of a car battery, of staying up as late as I want, of playing video games rather than vacuuming, of making whatever I wanted for dinner without having to consider another person’s preferences, and of going out drinking with the boys every night.

But the thrill of the possibility of all those things died within the first hour that I arrived home alone last night.

For one, our house, which is relatively small, seemed like this huge empty space, with nobody other than myself and Mister Bunny to fill it. I could swear that there were echoes whenever I was chatting with my rabbit.

I spent most of the evening working on my computer, because I didn’t find it fun watching The Oscars without Francine there to talk to about the show. I even went to bed at about quarter to 11, which is rare, because Fran usually has to raise a huge fuss to get me to go to bed on time and I'm always eager to watch "just a little bit" of the 11 o'clock news.

The night before, Fran and I were crammed into my Baba’s 60 year old double bed (where we each have the equivalent of about the width of postage stamp to sleep on and my legs stick out from the end of the bed to halfway across the room). Then, when Alexander woke at about 5:30 in the morning crying, and I brought him into bed with us, it was a tight and uncomfortable sleep for the rest of the morning, with Alexander sprawled out comfortably and Fran and I hanging on desperately to the edges of the bed where our bodies teetered.

At first, I remember thinking how comfortable and spacey our bed would be having the whole thing to myself. Again, that lasted about 2 minutes, because I missed snuggling up to my wife. And, complain as I do about those times when Alexander wakes in the night and ends up snuggling between us, then stretches out, uses our bodies as punching bags in the throes of his sleep, one of the great things to wake up to Saturday and Sunday mornings are his curious smiling eyes and that whack on the face that means: “Okay Daddy, enough sleep. It’s time to play now.”

But, alas, my bachelor dreams were short-lived.

I washed the dishes and cleaned the kitchen almost immediately after having supper last night. And despite thinking it was a waste of time because I was the only one there and would be working late and virtually dropping into bed within an hour or so of getting home tonight, I even made the bed this morning, complete with ensuring that all the extraneous froo-froo pillows were in their proper place. I also took out last night’s garbage. Yes, by myself, without being prompted, or without complaining. (Fran can always smell when the garbage is more than 4 hours old and is a regular garbage taker-outer. I’m usually of the mind that you only need to take it out when it’s full. But I thought it would be a good idea to keep the kitchen smelling nice and clean.)

Tonight I’ll likely want to dust and then run the vacuum through the house.

Man, do I ever not know how to live like a bachelor any more.

But I’m not complaining. I’ve truly got it all. An incredible wife and best-friend and a most delightful and lovable child. It’s going to be a tough two weeks, is all. This week, alone at home, and next week in Pittsburgh.